[Otclassof1973] NAUGHTY'S NOT NICE

[neufsaid at juno.com]

OK, back by no demand whatsoever - here's this year's Xmas poem.
Why do I seem to have it in for elves?

NAUGHTY’S NOT NICE

There’s a pre-Christmas rite, that counts every infraction,
Parting naughty from nice, using simple subtraction.
Were you good?  Were you bad?  Are you frequently lewd?
Do you lie on your taxes or say something rude?

There’s a Naughty Patrol that keeps track and keeps score;
And they’re usually waiting outside your front door.
They’re the elves that old Santa can’t stand having ‘round
So he picks out the worst; packs them off southward bound. 

Now, these elves are no creampuffs, you won’t have a prayer
If they cancel your presents.  (Be careful out there!)
‘Cause, elves just can’t tell when enough is enough,
And those mean little gremlins know how to play rough.

If your gingerbread house isn’t quite up to code,
They’ll have OSHA condemn your bad cookie abode.
Or they’ll cut down your tree, even taint your egg nog,
With their internet savvy, they'd virus your blog,

But it doesn’t stop there, if they hate your cologne,
You could find yourself barred from the Mistletoe Zone.
Yes, the elves have a wee bit of bad attitude
And they’ll rat out your ass to the white bearded dude. 

If you think you’re in trouble, then heed my advice,
Do your best every day (at least TRY to be nice).
So, improve your demeanor and get hip to the trip,
Or prepare for the worst - for you might just get zip.


Happy Ho-Ho-Holidays, everyone.  Slowly step away from the stollen.  You're 50 now and that stuff'll go straight to your hips.

Marvin

#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9#9
It is Christmas in the heart 
that puts Christmas in the air.
WT Ellis